When it comes to ways to enjoy the Philnote, we Apple fans are really pretty spoiled. While I missed the fun over at MacRumors, I was having a great time following along via Twitter. I particularly enjoyed the play-by-play provided by Paul ‘being a git worked for Dvorak so I’m going to make it work for me’ Thurrott. I’ve reproduced his stream below. Now, if I were a fictional character like the Macalope I might indulge in some line-by-line name calling. Instead I’ll just make the observation that this guy is an even bigger dick in realtime.

• “So… iPhoto 09 has features that Facebook, WinLive Photos/Photo Gallery, and Picasa have had for months. That’s what I’m seeing here right?”
• “So … iMovie 09 fixes the wrongs of iMovie 08. Good. But who EDITS video, really? And this is the 2nd of three new products he’s showing?”
• “And speaking of applications targetting a seriously niche audience … GarageBand. 09. Oh my.”
• “There’s nothing like playing to an overly-friendly house. You can get copious applause just by showing up.”
• “Yep. I expect the NYT to trumpet Apple’s “invention” of photo face detection any moment now.”
• “Oh, i see … iLife was product #1. iWork is #2. They still make iWork? :) JK”
• “What kills me about apple: They have 1 year to prepare for macworld. and iLife is *still* not ready to ship today. Late Jan.? What the heck?”
• “Aside from iPhoto, every product they’ve shown today is cool but limited in audience scope. Why do they focus so much on things noone uses?”
• “Case in point. Keynote. For those people who a) use Macs and b) give presentations. This is a seriously limited audience.”
• “Actual comment from random Apple live blog: It will show your slide and your notes – VERY COOL APP!”
• “Um, right. That’s what presentation programs DO. :) Geesh.”
• “Actually, I should apologize. Pages makes Keynote look like a best-seller by comparison. :)”
• “Mac Box Set is a good idea: Leopard, iLife 09, and iWork 09 for $169. Microsoft should bundle like that. Oh, wait.”
• “iWork.com should be about as useful as Zune to Zune music sharing. In fact, there are probalby more Zune users than iWork users. Nevermind.”
• “And I was just thinking that we needed another Google Docs/Acrobat.com/Office Live. :)”
• “[crosses fingers] And please tell me iwork.com is based on me.com technology :)”
• “Apple guys will always buy the Apple stuff, even when free things are out there. They’re just wired that way”
• “And the final cherry on top of iWork.com: you will have to pay for it. Thank you Apple. I was looking for another way to shovel money at you”
• “#3 – new Macbook Pro”
• “17-inch MacBook Pro that is. I wonder if that means no new Mini?”
• “And does that mean no Snow Leopard discussion? No DRM-free music at iTunes?”
• “[crosses fingers again] I hope they show another unibody manufacturing video!”
• “One last thing … iTunes”
• “BTW, it’s “one MORE thing” Phil. :)”
• “Apple folds on variable pricing. That actually is kind of a shock. It’s also what they should have done years ago.”
• “My guess: Variable pricing was a requirement in order for Apple to get DRM-free music. I guess they’re not omnipotent after all.”
• “Yep: By end of Q1, all 10 million songs on iTunes will be DRM free. I’m guessing they won’t be MP3, however.”
• “Final recap on Macworld. Mostly “eh”. Exception: Battery on new 17-in MBP is interesting, unless they start catching on fire 2 mos from now.”

Well, it could just be an elaborate marketing ploy for the LittleSnapper screen capture software and its companion website, but the above image — captured and Twittered about by Realmac Software’s Danny Greg — from the official Apple iPhone 3G product page suggests that the iPhone Nano may actually exist. Maybe. I guess we’ll find out soon enough.

• The Tweet
• The Image
• LittleSnapper

As you’ve probably read by now, Apple CEO Steve Jobs has released a letter concerning his health. It’s fairly short so I’ll quote the whole thing:

Dear Apple Community,

For the first time in a decade, I’m getting to spend the holiday season with my family, rather than intensely preparing for a Macworld keynote.

Unfortunately, my decision to have Phil deliver the Macworld keynote set off another flurry of rumors about my health, with some even publishing stories of me on my deathbed.

I’ve decided to share something very personal with the Apple community so that we can all relax and enjoy the show tomorrow.

As many of you know, I have been losing weight throughout 2008. The reason has been a mystery to me and my doctors. A few weeks ago, I decided that getting to the root cause of this and reversing it needed to become my #1 priority.

Fortunately, after further testing, my doctors think they have found the cause—a hormone imbalance that has been “robbing” me of the proteins my body needs to be healthy. Sophisticated blood tests have confirmed this diagnosis.

The remedy for this nutritional problem is relatively simple and straightforward, and I’ve already begun treatment. But, just like I didn’t lose this much weight and body mass in a week or a month, my doctors expect it will take me until late this Spring to regain it. I will continue as Apple’s CEO during my recovery.

I have given more than my all to Apple for the past 11 years now. I will be the first one to step up and tell our Board of Directors if I can no longer continue to fulfill my duties as Apple’s CEO. I hope the Apple community will support me in my recovery and know that I will always put what is best for Apple first.

So now I’ve said more than I wanted to say, and all that I am going to say, about this.

Steve

So what should we make of this? Well, for a start, from that “I’m getting to spend the holiday season with my family” I’d imagine this was written a while ago — say, actually during the holiday season, if not before — and if it had been released sooner it would have had the desired effect of dampening the rampant speculation.

Reaction from the Apple Community has been as expected, with choruses of “We told you so” and “Good on Steve for telling everyone else to go f— themselves”. The one dissenting voice so far has come from Dizzle at I Drank the Kool-Aid — who even then only goes as far as calling-out Apple PR over their statement that Jobs’ absence from the Macworld keynote was “more about politics than his pancreas.” This was, as she observes, simply a lie. (Although we can safely assume that they didn’t actually know much more than us when they made the statement, the fact that it was so definite counts against them.)

But what does this statement actually tell us? As Steve notes, the news that Phil Schiller was going to deliver the Macworld keynote “set off another flurry of rumors about [Steve's] health.” Those rumours were basically that Steve was too ill to present the keynote himself, and as this open letter refuses to acknowledge, those rumours were correct.

• Apple PR

So as the Apple world descends on San Francisco for Macworld 2009, what treats are there in store for the faithful? Well, as is only to be expected, the rumours are flying thick and fast. The latest centre around the 17″ MacBook Pro, which will apparently not only now come in an aluminium unibody enclosure, and possibly also boast a quad-core CPU, but will feature a super-thin, non-removable, extra-long-lasting battery. A Silver-Zinc battery, no less. Man, 2009 already feels just like the future.

Elsewhere, all the usual suspects have been accounted for. The Mac Pro gets a mention, and then there’s the Mac Mini. Not satisfied with it simply not being discontinued, it’s said to be gaining dual display support. MacTechNews.de will see these, and raise you a 28″ iMac.

The thing which all of these rumours have about them is that they’re just believeable enough to be true. Which makes them dull. Of course, there’s always the rumour that the iLife and iWork applications are destined for the clouds. Because sometimes editing video on a laptop just isn’t slow enough. Or the already-evergreen MacBook Nano. Or the rather left-field Apple Media Server. Or how about the iGlove?

None of these rumours crazy enough for you? Then how about this one: Steve Jobs for US CTO. With a special iChat appearance by President-Elect Obama himself as Phil’s “one more thing”. I guess it would make a neat stepping stone for Steve’s 2012 White House run.